i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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