I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize