How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize