The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
The air taste purple.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
