I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize