I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
