I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
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