i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
