y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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