Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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