I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize