My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
