I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
