i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Actions speak louder than pants.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Randomize
