Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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