can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
