**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize