he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
