that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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