just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
