Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
you would pick up someone in the library
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
