How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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