After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
