So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize