hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Small penises have feelings too.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
