so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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