i don't plan on having that self control this summer
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
