I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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