He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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