The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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