just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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