I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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