everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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