To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize