Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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