so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
