Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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