he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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