Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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