I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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