bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize