Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Randomize
