Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
