My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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