Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
