The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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