would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
