She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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