My first STD was from a foam party
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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