Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
