Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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